so I was woken up by my mom around 8 this morning, the first thing she asked was "do you have school today?" That got me kind of nervous b/c she sounded so tired and kinda serious... and it turned out she has insomnia. She's stressed out b/c my bro doesn't seem to be doing too well in school-- his grades and perhaps attitude and performance isn't satisfactory therefore the school withheld the invitation until the end of this quarter; if he makes improvement then they will invite him back to wyoming seminary, if not he will have to look for a different school or to go back to Taiwan. I wonder if my bro understands the seriousness of this whole situation, he's 17 now, he should have some kind of a clue.

for some reason though, I'm not too worried-- I feel like things happen for a reason and if he's meant to stay he will. I feel like he will, I hope he will. I don't plan on finding him another school b/c to me I don't think he should be given a second choice. He needs to learn to commit himself to something, and being a student means he needs to commit himself to learning and achieving the type of academic success that a student should be achieving. He wants to go to North Eastern, well good-- then do something about his grades. He wants to excel? Well good, work on it. Nothing comes easy, everyone has to learn that sooner or later, and the sooner he learns the better it is for him.

But yeah, my biggest fear has always been getting a phone call with bad news from Taiwan. She really got me quite nervous and paranoid. Not that my bro's future isn't important but it's really not that bad, no big deal. I don't mind getting calls like that as long as they have nothing to do with family's well being (in the health department). I wouldn't know what to do if I were to get bad news via phone, b/c that's happened once when my grandpa from mom's side passed away and I would hate to go through that again. I'm worried still about my grandpa (dad's side), I hope he's okay.

So after I finished talking to mom I just got up, freshen up, ate a bit, and started my NY Ballet Workout. That workout lasted for about 1 hr I think... at the end of it I wanted to throw up, felt like I was gonna faint. I realized the workout gets more and more intense and I find myself struggling with the movements. I used to be so good at it, I used to have no problem doing any of those moves and now I just look like a clown. Used to.... do a lot of things well... I really regret not continuing with ballet and piano lessons--- if anything these are the only regrets in my life right now. Can I still pick it up? I know it's going to be hard but I promise myself, one day I'll start my piano lessons and I will continue to do the ballet workout at least twice per week. I need to have more discipline, and I suppose I can start with that.

Alright... glad no bad news from family, everyone's alive and well, dad's a bit sick and so is uncle but I know they'll be okay b/c it's just a cold (i think/hope). Aye... I don't wanna worry about them, we should all take good care of ourselves.

:)