Mood last night, it was fun. I love the decor I love the venue it's just awesome. I think that'll be my new fav place to go for thursdays... I have it good right now-- no work just school. It almost makes me feel like I don't deserve it and that this lifestyle is really a luxury. I guess it is in a sense, but why should I feel guilty about it? I do have lots of homework and I guess each week I just keep putting it off until a couple days before it is due-- not a very smart thing to do but what can I say, it's hard to kick a bad habit.
I am really a lucky girl though, I mean we take so many things for granted; this freedom, this life style, this beautiful place where we live in. Last Sunday I took Wong Li and her dad to the Santa Monica Pier after we shopped on third street. I can tell that her dad was just mesmorized by the ocean. He kept saying "wow there's no end, it extends far beyond belief". He's not a very well educated man, in fact he is illiterate, but he's a very honest and hard working man who cares so much about his daughter. I wanted to say that this is how it is for every family, especially for Chinese traditional families. That this is a typical father daughter relationship-- the dad always looks out for his kids first, the dad always makes sure the kids get what they want and need before he satisfies his own needs. But that's not true, it doesn't apply to all families, and I guess that's something we (the lucky children) shouldn't take for granted either. But yeah that got me thinking of how blessed I am.
It's the little things-- the fact that I can just sit here and blog instead of wasting my life away at work (not that I'm being very productive or anything)is a luxury. The fact that I can go to the beach and jog on a thursday afternoon with a friend is a blessing. The fact that I can pursue a career, a dream of mine and not have to worry about taking care of myself is just... I don't even know what word to use anymore. That I can just chill sit back and relax and really be a couch potato, that I can even choose to travel around the world if I wanted, and not having to earn the funds myself is really, something that not many people can say they have. I'm grateful, thankful, extremely extremely lucky to have the parents that I have. That they can offer me the world pretty much w/o them having to ask for help. Wong Li's fortune is earned by her misfortune to begin with, and even so her family has to rely on others for help. I think my ultimate goal in life is to become self-reliant, that no matter what I will never ever be the one who reach out for help, but be the one who offers and extends a helping hand to whomever in need.
I said this to my family once when my step mom mentioned something, something regarding how my dad can't depend on any of his siblings and instead would be the one to help them out. I simply said "well it's better than being the ones who need help". My dad just agreed, and my step mom just shut up. I think it's true though, I mean is it that bad to be someone who's capable of helping others? I still believe, it is better to give than to receive.
One day I'll pay my dad back, I'll buy him his first Mercedez Benz or BMW or whatever he wants, and I'll also buy myself that nice little condo/apt on Santa Monica Beach. That's a promise to myself, watch me.