V-day : vent day.

Every once in a while is healthy but the best case scenario is that I learn to
1) take it easy 2) be positive 3) be appreciative 4) let nothing get to me 5) handle stress better 6) take vitamin Bs... OR just quit... hahaha right... funny how often I entertain the idea of quitting... or how easily I entertain the idea of quitting yet I never do........

It took a shower (once again) to help me figure out what my deal is... something about standing in an enclosed space with water running over me and nothing else to do but think... it is surprisingly effective when it comes to problem solving (whether it be emotional, creative, or making up lyrics). Anyway, the deal is I DON"T WANT TO SETTLE. An internship is just an internship, true, but couldn't it be a perfect internship? With any situation couldn't it be perfect? The other areas of my life right now is nearly perfect to me, and that means I'm generally happy with everything. But when it comes to internship---- I can't say the same. Am I learning? Aside from the fact that there are different ways of doing things I don't feel like I've learned anything. Am I being too judgemental and impatient since it has only been two weeks? Yes maybe... but intuitively I know it is possible to find my ideal work environment and it is out there; this just isn't it. I can sense it... and I know I made a mistake but I also know this happened for a reason. For what reason I can't be sure yet, but it happened for a reason. Whatever it is, I've decided to just do my best, count the days, and hope that I will find my dream job when I graduate. I will find my ideal job w/o compromising myself, and until then I'll do what I have to do ... consider it investment. I guess we don't always get what we want at first, but it'll come... I hope.